Dear Bridesmaids…

and house party ladies,

bridezilla-41After watching an afternoon of “Briiiidezillas” (yes, I say it just like the show says it), I promise the following:

  1. You do not have to cut, color, grow out or do anything you don’t want to do with your hair. Wear it how you like or however you feel most comfortable.
  2. I will not make you wear some god-awful dress. You guys are creating your own dresses for a reason. It should be a style that fits you best and that you are happy with. I refuse to make you wear something where pieces of you are hanging out, bulging out or otherwise out in any way.
  3. I will not make you get a tattoo in my honor. I also will not make you cover any tattoos.
  4. You do not have to lose or gain weight to be in our wedding. I promise not to make you get on a scale, ever. Also, I will not police your food or beverage intake.
  5. You do not have to “yes ma’am” me.
  6. I will not sign you up for 5am boot camp and expect you to go in order to stay in the bridal party.

All you guys need to do is show up in pretty dresses and outfits, look cute, take pictures and have a fabulous time.

Really.

Plus, Mike has my permission to not marry me if I act like any of those crazy bitches on TV.

-Ali